NIKOLA

A Smart TALE About A Genius

Dearest Katharine,

Oh, how do I miss thee? Let me count the ways. (Gratitude to Miss Browning’s poetry.) How is France? I trust you had spectacular weather in Paris and Nice? It’s been frightfully warm and humid in New York, but not so much in the Berkshires, although I’ve not been away nearly enough. And you can imagine. I’m fraught with worry over your imminent arrival Stateside. It’s not that our home is not ready to accommodate your ferocious appetite for fun, but rather, your dizzying display of sharing your joie de vivre with our family and close friends. I suspect they are not nearly as accepting as your eclectic group of Latin Quarter friends. They would definitely ruffle more than a few tail feathers here in New York. But as your loving husband, I will always accommodate your demands.

And so, as requested, I have convinced Nikola to join us for the long holiday weekend. I am aware that his presence alone will create controversy, here and possibly abroad. I do find him a most amicable fellow, but I worry that his mind is far superior to those who might dine with us each evening. Moreover, I know that not inviting him would have left you bored with the rest of our guests.

He has already sent me a list of requests, the first one being that none of our lady guests wear earrings. I found that quite odd. I hope you can get him to share why. And he can only stay for three days. Why is he constantly obsessed with the pairings of threes? Is it some mathematical equation that escaped me at boarding school? And why must he travel with pigeons? Might he be using them as carriers of news while here? Or perhaps he’d use them to deliver more veiled threats to our neighbor J.P. [Morgan]? I do not pretend to understand why he insists that J.P. fund his latest invention. I suspect he’s trying to get back at Edison. He still maintains that his lab stole many of his inventions and will profit mightily from them. It all seems quite mad, like something from Mary Shelley’s book Frankenstein. But alas, perhaps his genius is yet to be recognized, despite his foibles.

I had lunch with him a few weeks ago. I find it quite remarkable that he thinks the pyramids possess some giant energy system capable of derailing our marvelous electrical system, making our day-to-day lives much more enjoyable and easier. And, he did prattle on about Edison. But lately, he sounds vindictive and seems to harbor jealousy. What would our world look like without his profound contributions to society? Even now, given the option, I would much prefer to share these words with you using his new device, the telephone. Imagine Nikola thinking he can move electricity without wires and transmit it through the air. Preposterous, I say. But who am I to be certain? I fear our world is spinning out of control. All of these changes. What will our children be delivered into?

And, I’m a bit reluctant to invite Reverand Lynch again. You will recall their argument about religious dogma and the need for mankind to have a moral compass to keep us on the road to salvation. But having said that, and after a rather long-winded lunch with Tesla a month ago, he’s been keen on this new “mystical” philosophy called Theosophy, which believes that the universe is one giant, energetic presence or “life force,” as he calls it. He may even write an article about his findings for the magazine in the new year. He knows his onions on the subject.

Some of my friends at the New York Guardian have called him a hoaxer, a hoodwinker. I myself cannot say, as I do not possess his scientific knowledge of his world. I know that our food must include copious amounts of garden vegetables, as he will not consume fish, fowl, or beef. I hope this does not cause you or our other guests much inconvenience when you arrive. I know how some of my guests love hunting for our feasts.

To that end, I’ve arranged a duck hunt and know that his Serbian scientist friend, [Michael] Pupin, and Samuel [aka Mark Twain] have agreed to participate. I'm not sure how that will sit with Nikola, but a bit of fresh country air will do him good, if only he will walk with us. Suffice it to say, I will never force him to fire another punt. I’ve learned my lesson on that front.

I’ve also invited George [Sylvester] Viereck, that fussy poet fellow, but such a dear friend of Nikola. Perhaps he will stand guard over Nikola’s other peculiarities. I’ve arranged for their sleeping quarters to be next to each other. I pray he can help with Nikola's restlessness and early-morning walking. And I just learned from one of my editors that Tesla wrote a poem for George titled “Fragments of Olympian Gossip.” Imagine that. I shall procure a copy for you.

Ah, one more thought, before I end this letter, please do not mention anything about “signals from space.” His claim of radio signals emanating from Mars will only upset our guests, notably Rev. Lynch. The ridicule he faced after publishing his book Talking with the Planets has done nothing to diminish his enthusiasm for the subject. And while I remain open-minded to his theories, our more “delicate” guests may not find his continued experiments in Colorado Springs amusing dinner conversation.

That is all for now. I'm counting down the days of your arrival. Safe travels, my darling. We shall have fun, no dewdroppers. I promise.

Your loving husband,

Robert

[A letter from Robert Underwood Johnson, editor of The Century Magazine, purchased from a bookstore in Stockbridge, MA.]

Someone once posted that Eno was the Tesla of the studio. So with that in mind, please enjoy this musical interlude in Nikola’s honor.